American Muslima Writer -Daring to Work Towards Jannah

Well MY CALM CHAOS is where I will update (sporadically) about how to deal with ADD/ADHD, Chaos in the home and life, Home Management Notebooks, and general tips on how to streamline your life.
I will also be adding cool Islamic charts to help you with your life later on. I do use them myself :D

Brandy A. Chase is where I'll be typing my general thoughts and info on which I'll export from this blog. and maybe keep AMW for my writing thoughts. We'll see how it goes insha'Allah. I'm just trying to organize everything so I'll let you kow when it gets going.

Well be patient with me I DO have ADD and it will take me a long time to manage all the things that are juggling up in the air.

I also figured out the problems with Jummah Resolutions and Jennah Standards International Homeschooling and COMMENTING! ARG what a pain to do all that work and then the comments weren't working. i tested them and now they are fine so I hope that they will both be good resources to improving your and other's lives. So go on and let us know your resolutions now. (I'm still playing with a background for JR cause the font is too small i think.)

Be sure to check in on all my other blogs insha'Allah ONE will benefit you somehow.
XOXOX to all my dedicated readers and future readers.

I've had a moving experience lately.



I was called one day suddenly out of the blue a few weeks ago about a Canadian Muslimah with three kids who needed help finding a hosue and a job here in UAE. Immediatly I did my best to call people and see about getting her a job but subhan'Allah everyone turned me down. Next I thought about the housing problem. Next door to me they were building houses and so I told my hubby to find out more info. He did and so finallyI had something substancial to tell this sister. But something held me back from calling her right away. I hemmed and hawed a few days and everyday my husband would say have you called her and I'd make stupid excuses why I hadn't.



The truth of the matter is I was scared. When you let someone into your life you have to expect your life to change. Either for the better or worse. Everyone you meet impacts your life in some way and I was scared of how this unknown sister in need would impact my life. Finally in the middle of dinner at the Mall I just took a few calming breaths and called her (after my hubby heckling me of course). I told her I had some info about houses and I'd like to meet with her when she had the chance. She sounded confused by my call and like she was too busy to deal with my call right then so I hung up feeling a bit sweaty but relieved i got the contact over with. Soon after I got sick and my family did too and every so often my husband and I would discuss her situation and we talked about the posibility of her staying with us if she needed. After I felt a little better I called her up to check up on her and she sounded more at ease and definitly interested in meeting me ASAP. So I arranged for her to come to my house and as soon as she stepped out of my hubby's car and onto the sidewalk and we exchanged kisses I felt this giddy feeling come over me. I welcomed her and her cute three kids into my home and we chatted non-stop. We tried to check out the houses near me but the owner was being shifty so it was a dead-end there. SO we walked up to Al-Ain Mall to socialize and get some dinner. It was a lovely walk and having someone to talk with while you walk is something I haven't experienced for a long time. We prayed together (my first time leading a woman for over a year) and ate together and shared experiences. We really clicked well together and had fun.

Finally it was time for her to go and so I bid her fond farewell after we relaxed in the garden for a while at my house. After she left I felt restless like I needed to keep talking. I needed to keep interacting. But I only had my kids to deal with. My huband was tired and hungry and just wanted to sleep soon after eating so I didn't get to chat much with him. We both agreed how nice she was though.

A few days passed and I called her to ask if I could visit her and she agreed at first but then she became so busy the next few days that I couldn't see her. I felt like i was walking on eggshells because I didn't want to seem pushy and I didn't want her to think I'm trying to stalk her or something. Sometimes I think someone likes me and then later I would find out that I like them more than they like me - so I'm cautious about overstepping boundries now. So I waited a few more days and it was finally Jummah(Friday) and I decided to cal her and ask her to have picnic with us in the park. She said she was busy because she was going to a gathering for Moulid (Prophet Muhammad's Birthday) then at the last second she asked if i wanted to come and then arranged for me to do so. I was excited. All these women's number's I had (who live in Al-Ain) for so long in my phone i was about to meet them and I got that scared feeling again. How would they impact my life?

I went to the party and had fun but the best part was really seeing how much I got along with this canadian sister. I felt drawn to her soul as I had been drawn to many of my closest friends before in the past. SO I insisted to take her home and she accepted and when we got to her house and I walked her inside we were laughing SO MUCH. She invited me the next morning (THIS MORNING) to her house and I agreed. I spent the night hemming over if she likes me as much as I like her. (this is a big issue for me)

This morning was one of the most relaxing and best days I've had since I came to UAE. We had coffee and hung out with our kids and let them run around on the grass, we laughed and chatted and had deep conversations abut life and meaning there-in. We affirmed how short this life is and how we need to think about the next life and how to get to Jannah (YA RABB!). It was the first time I felt like I really belonged as a friend since comming to UAE. She's the kind of person that you instantly become best friends with. I enjoyed my morning so thouroughly that when my husband came to pick me up in the early afternoon i was so sad. SO of course I'm worried about still if I like her more than she likes me when she invites me TOMORROW MORNING to come again. That settled it for me. OK she likes me or she definitly wouldn't invite me THE NEXT DAY. So now I will have to beg my hubby to drive me all the way again. It's amazing how much we have in common, though we grew up so far apart. She's even DaVinci like me (I let her read the book)! SO this afternoon I felt an emptyness as I wandered my house. Once again I had only myself and my small kids to talk to. I Missed having a friend there to chat with when something enters my head. It's weird for me this sudden need to socailize because I've spent the past year and few months pretty much by myself all the time and got used to it. I never knew how much I missed having friends and how much friends can be good for your life. I've been a better Muslim since I met her and I've tried my best to impact her life in good ways (insha'Allah).

The sad part of this is her time in UAE may be temporary and I might loose this friend (though there is always e-mail!) but next time I think I wont be as nervous to meet people. That I'm becoming more confident about letting new poeple into my life.

Well so far no sponsor/investor. I'm a little downhearted but I'm sure soon things will turn around. I have a gut instinct and it tells me to keep waiting and soon someone will come to the rescue. Things do fall neatly into place though. I went and saw a location again and this time talked with the manager of the real estate. He gave me some pointers so I wrote a business letter to secure placement for the shop i want for a whole 10 days. My Hubby will take it to the manager tomorrow. I made him laugh by not knowing who the owner was (who is a Sheik of high importance in UAE). But in a good way laughing. He liked that i was clueless. I hope this works to our advantage. I'm just hoping everything falls in place IN TIME! I know it's ALlah's Will what happnes and doesn't so I'm not very worried just hopeful that Allah has WIlled for this to be the place for the shop.

I've talked more with my co-partner in this business and we clearly need to hash out more ideas because we had two completly different business ideas. This is a flaw of Arab business, very little "pre-planning". They talk on the phone: "I wanna make X Business and 50-50 profits."
Investor "OK lets meet." So they meet and what happens it all gets explained verbally with very little written. Later down the road a problem happens between the partners and no written agreement was made and someone gets screwed royally. I will be sure everything is written down to the littlest remark so everything is clear.
So I clarified what I want my business to be but it's kinda scary to demand what you want and put the other person's idea to the shreader. But I know for sure what I'm planning will be big and awesome and work to not only bring in the money but will provide a unique service to the town. That's what's important after all. No one will buy from you if you're not helping them.

On a new note I just recieved "The DaVinci Method" a book to help those of us with the gift of DaVinci/ADD/ADHD/Bi-polar/etc.. learn to control and use our gift to the best instead of repressing it with medicine. Everything rings so true for me. I'm the kind of person who sits around dreaming using only 10% of my ability until a crisis happens (usually made worse by my waiting) and I rev into 100% and demand everyone around me do the same. But it expl;ained to me that people i work around may be giving normally their 20% and rev it up to 30% max and then think i'm putting too much preasure on them for they work best as a cog in the wheel instead of the axle that turns things. It's so facinating. And fianlly a relief to stop thinking of myself as lazy, ADD, procrastinator and finally as a creative genious who has all the potential i give myself to have. So parents if your kids need ritalin or you need ritalin or adderal then read this book first and save yourself moeny in the long run not buying drugs. Google it: "The DaVinci Method" It's fabulous! I've read half the book so far and I can't put it down. It also lets you realize the different brain waves you use diffeernt situation and what you should use to get what you want out of your mind/body. Like I'm usually in Alpha/Theta phase most the day unless my HUbby comes home and is like why haven't you done this or that then I rev it up to 100% (in Beta, where Normal people always stay) and get things done fast then kick back to my alpha stages. He just sees a clean house and doesn't understand what I had to go thorugh to get things done. But we're working on harmonizing.

See the arival of my book to help me learn to focus better (which i thought was lost in the mail and never would come) came that ezact day and moment I was feeling bored and anxious in the house because i had no sponsor and was running out of things to do with planning the business. Now suddenly I have so many new ideas again. Alhamdulliah, Allah KNOWS when we need something and gives it to us.

All this spare time though has let me pent out my frustrations on my garden by shaping it up after staring at it everyday blankly. Nothing better to tune your thoughts back to sanity than to kick a shovel deep into the earth and rip up a mountain of black gold (dirt) and spread it where it needs to go. I have now a carfully bordered L-shape flower bed to put in transpalnts and new seeds. Masha'Alah nothing so comforting than to plant seeds and watch them grow. My neighbor helped me last night and I took the initiative while he wa at work to finish the rest of it because he doesn't liek to see me working i think. Everytime I shove that massive shovel into the ground happily he goes Pleas please let me do it for you. And because i know he LIKES to do it and I like people to do their passions I let him and fuss around with a small shovel just so i have something to do too. But today I did it! Muuahahahaha!!! Then i have to go to Carrefour to buy more seeds before he sees the empty bed and runs for his seed bag beats me to the planting hehehe. SO Maybe if my Hubby will give me more money tomorrow i'll go get seeds. I'm thinking blue for that side. The other side has purple and Multi-colors so I think we need more even colors for the small side of the L.
Thanks to all the recent comments I was so pleasently surprised to have so many after months of jsut one or two I actaully had 7 today. I was shocked. Happily. Thanks and I' m trying to comment on yours too but some websites I write a long comment then never see it posted and that's frustrating!
By the way I DID go to the Rugby Club Arts and Crafts Show. It was terrrific! It felt just like being with my mom at her shows but only smaller. Lots of Photographers too with their awesome pics. I really wish I had money to buy something but I had nada. I really wanted this children's book with beautiful hand colored pictures but my Hubby said we couldn't afford it. It's a beautiful book though. It encouraged me though that there was a high calling for arts and crafts in AL-Ain. (Aso the day it was held was the day after I thought of having an arts and craft store and low and behold a show was that same day? Coincedance or fate?) Allah's Will for sure.