Friends are something nearly everyone has to some degree. Some have acquaintances others have social circles they frequent others have deep best friend type relationships.
I've always had my small pack of close intelligent wonderful friends, not too many, not too few. Wherever I go it may take a few months but eventually I manage to make a close friend and then from there find a social circle.
This time around in UAE I found small social circles but couldn't really find that one true person I was absolutely close to. It's been a frustrating and lonely road for me to walk. Sometimes I'd go a week or two without seeing any other sisters or talking to them IN PERSON. Sure I always have my blog and you all out there saved me from madness at times but you know there is nothing like a good face to face.
Just before Ramadan this woman called me having found me on the Homeschooling network I'm in. We chatted and it was nice to talk to someone but I never figured she'd actually meet up with me and we'd get any hanging out time. She's a busy mother of seven kids after all. But I was pleasantly surprised to get her call the next day, and the next, and the next, and you guessed it, the next!
Eventually we did indeed meet up. Our families met and we all hit it off just fine masha'Allah. But I'm not just writing about this experience to say Yay I got a new friend, (well I might sneak one Yay in there....YAY!!!! ) but to let you know that ONE person can drastically change the quality of your life. For better or worse.
My soul is forever searching for the straight path and ways to stay on it and mostly with my social circles I get easily persuaded to their lifestyles. But when asking my new friend about the problems in my life she had not only new answers but Allah allowed THROUGH her for me to FIND answers. Sorry if confusing, let me backtrack.
I got the chance to spend the night at her house one evening. All day I could feel my soul changing, learning, accepting things. That night I still didn't have the answers to my greatest problem but I had hope I'd soon find it, somehow. I couldn't sleep and her house was quiet. I thought about reading Qur'an so I went to her bookcase and browsed the Titles searching for something inspiring. I found a little book, gosh, can't remember the title, but it's about the Love and worship of Allah. I eagerly settled onto her couch and lulled by the AC dripping water like my own personal waterfall I opened the book. Only a few pages in, my world was flipped upside down.
I realized the extent of what I was missing in my life and how to fix it. Shivers literally crawled over my entire body a few times as I took in a new way to appreciate Allah and Islam.
I stayed up all night reading that book cover to cover. I finished it at 3:30am and went to wake my friend for her Sahour since she wanted to continue her fastings before Ramadan and as she prepared things I told her about how this book had effected me. She offered for me to fast with her that day but I was still reluctant.
I had been DREADING Ramadan coming, not for the Fasting but for feeling the guilt of missing prayers during the Holy Ramadan. Then a few of her daughters filed in to eat and start their fasting too. Suddenly I was surrounded by righteous Muslimahs. The tender feeling of being part of the Muslim Ummah over took me and inspired me to fast with them that day. It was wonderful. But even better than spending the day with her family and getting to know them more was the effect they had on my life.
From that day on I haven't missed a single prayer.
Allah gave me a friend who gave me exactly what I needed, not only a close companion but a way for me to better myself for HIS sake. Instead of giving me quantity, He gave me Quality.
All I can say for that is Alhamdulillah and SubhanAllah.
Thank you Allah for giving me this wonderful friend who never fails to encourage me to better myself for Your Sake.
Thank you my Friend for giving me time in your busy life, may Allah reward you and grant all your du'as.
7 intelligent thoughts:
Alhamdulillah thats soooooo nice :)
Wow...it seems we both recognized the same thing and wrote about it even on the same day...I couldn't believe when I read your post. Friends are really important...
Thanks for visiting as well, and congrats on your publishing(s).
Salaams Brandy Dear:
Sisterhood is one of the most precious gifts in Islam.
Speaking of friends, I was going through Bukhari's Book of Manners to glean some gems for the sisters at the prison. Here's an interesting one:
BE A LITTLE RESERVED IN YOUR LOVE FOR YOUR FRIEND
Hadith 1328
… ‘Ubayd al Kindi said, “I heard ‘Ali say to Ibn al Kawwa, ‘Do you know what the first on said? He said, “Be a little reserved in your love for your friend, for some day he may become your enemy. And be a little reserved in your hatred for your enemy, for some day he may become your friend.”
Hmmm ... I have seen this come true in my life. I went to I.,,..S.,,..N.,,..A.,,$$$.. (Ya search engines) with my "best" friend here. It was so awful. I had never "lived" with her before. After 3 days in the hotel with her, well, let's just say that we didn't speak to each other all the way home (4+ hour drive). We hugged and said "as salaamu alaikum" when we got home. I cried for days because I love her so much. But we didn't speak on the phone for over a month. We used to phone several times a day. Then she called me and we made small talk. But it's not the same. She used to call me "ummi" and I called her "binti" but it's not the same :( To make matters worse, we know each other's deepest secrets.
Love you
You Know Who from the Anthology
(Used Anonymous for a reason)
AND OMG, the pic, I can imagine us looking like that as kids, you taller than me, and me shorter with darker hair (not telling anyone what our hair colors r now) butthe glasses r just about right.
Luv ya
As Salaamu 'alaikum!
Dear sister, I know how you feel when it comes to making friends and searching for the right friend!
MashaAllah your story is very inspirational! May Allah bless that sister with khair in dunya and akhira and may Allah make your heart content. Ameen! :) :) :)
Yep, one person can change so much. You were that person for me. Remember lunch, that first week of 8th grade? I had only been in AZ a month and knew no one....and then I knew one....and ALL her friends. :)
Thanks for always being there for me.
Love ya sis,
Amanda
What a nice surprise, you have me in tears my dear. Since you know I am busy I definetly was'nt looking for any "friends" but you we're a blessing for us also.
I do love you in the sake of ALLAH so much and see much hope and good in your future.
The road to paradise is'nt free habibty, but we'll work on getting there together.
Im gonna have to consider you a sister and not just a friend, my family very much thinks of you as part of the family!
And btw we r quantity as well as quality (remember theres 8 of us) here on a regular basis.
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