When I was a young child my best friend was a girl named Nicolette. She's an awesome chick and we had the funnest of times growing up. We would just call up and be like "So your house or mine this weekend?" Since then we've drifted into casual friends that talk now once every few months through little messages online. My other friends in Tucson also we barilly communicate anymore. Sometimes I find myself longing for those girly friendships again. In Lebanon I was close to having a best friend. She was Swedish named Katja. But after she moved to Sweden and I moved to UAE there has been little or no contact. I used to visit her weekly before I was pregnant, during pregnancy, she was even counting minutes between contractions with me, and of course after pregnancy until my daughter was about a year and a half old. We were comfortable with each other and would spend the day together. But though we got along well I never felt i was her BEST FRIEND. I still had to call and make appointments to visit her. I could never just assume i was invited over because that was the weekly plan.
Now in Emirates finding a best friend has been the hardest thing for me. I spoke before about this. Back when my Canadian friend who was like my twin was here. But she is gone and I haven't gotten more than one Instant Message from her in a year. Recently I've been meeting more regularly with another sister who's American and is around my age. But again I don't feel she views us as best friends who can just show up randomly at anothers house and it doesn't matter what the time or day or whatever.
That is one aspect of Lebanon I loved is you CAN just show up to people's houses and it's not rude, it's part of the culture. It's always nice thinking someone might randomly show up at your house by the Will of Allah. Never know when a friend might pop in. Which is why the Lebanese keep their pantries and houses perfectly in order for those unexpected visits. But still here in Emirates things are different even visiting Lebanese Family members here you have to call and make an appointment. So am I making too much of this best friend's thing? Are my expectations for women my age with kids unreasonable? Should I resign myself to never having that deep girly relationship again?
I'm an optimist and I don't really want to believe it wont happen but I can't believe for the past what, six years now I haven't had a really close best friend. Well there is my husband's younger sister but I feel she's not a best friend because I feel she's my sister. And the fact that she's younger than me has always meant I couldn't speak about certain things for years. But still if I could have that kind of relationship with someone NEAR me, my age, preferably with kids (so she can commiserate), I'd be so happy. Someone I could just randomly hang out with whenever I felt like it and who I know would be welcome to just pop by whenever they felt like it.
Or again am i dreaming? What with husband and kids schedules to deal with is this unrealistic?