SubhanAllah I've been really low islamically. Like ground level.
Then today subhanAllah something changed.
This song really inspired me:
What did I do today? I even downloaded it so I can have it anytime offline.
Then I was blog hopping (erm instead of getting down to posting like I should be doing about all these thing in my head that need out) and read this super Imaan lifting post about the Day of Judgement and how everything will die including the angels (which I hadn't known before this week).
Yesterday my daughter woke up early (for once) and we talked about Allah and discussed in depth about how everything is on Loan in this life and Allah can take it and Move it as He pleases and we have no control over that. Tough concepts to explain to a 4 year old but I broke it down with examples.
"Toys: Sometimes Allah give us money to buy toys, sometimes He decides another little girl needs toys far far away and so He lets us pack ours up into the box and give it away to Needy People and some man gets it and give it to his daughter. Allah gave you toys then Allah took your toys away. (to show her that taking isn't a mean and bad thing)
Sometimes Allah lets people be born and it makes some people very happy but sometimes they forget about Allah because they are too busy taking care of feeding and changing the baby. Sometimes he takes away the people we love because it is their time to go and it makes most people very sad but sometimes because they are sad they think more about Allah and what is important in trying to get to Jannah which is good. Allah can take and Allah can give.
Everything belongs to Allah. Just like your toys belong to you. If you want you can break them, if you want you can clean them. If you want you can throw them in the mud, if you want you can give them to someone and make someone else happy.
But everything, even you and me and daddy and your brother belong to Allah, yes even the toys, and he can keep us clean or let us be dirty or he can make us Alive or Die or be Muslims or not Muslims. He can do whatever He pleases because there is NOTHING greater than Allah. No one owns Allah. No one can MAKE HIM do something he doesn't Will."
And as the sunlight shone into our window by Allah's Will I never felt more at peace than really REALIZING and UNDERSTANDING the effects and meaning of Allah's Will. I felt my life was disposable at His Whim and I'm OK with that! Alhamdulillah if He is to take something precious from me. It's HIS to take. It's His Right to Take it. I never really GOT that in my heart before.
I knew the saying "To Him we Belong and to Him we return" but it never penetrated the depths of my heart to where I UNDERSTOOD it.
Just like if a Judge orders a murderer to the death penalty we all go "It's the judges right to order such a statement". No questions asked: No tearing our hair out in grief. No belittling the Judge's Authority and Questioning our Faith in the Judge's abilities to met out proper punishment. Yet Allah is the Ultimate Judge. And when people die like innocent babies, many too many turn away from God saying unfairly that HE is Cruel. Or Un Just.
It's Allah's to take or leave. It's HIS Right! SubhanAllah!
Definitely Imaan Lifting!